The Worst Christmas Song Ever
Posted by
Kevin
A commentator on this John Scalzi thread reminded me of the most horrible Christmas Song ever: Christmas Shoes. I wrote about it last year:
Tom was absolutely, one hundred percent correct: Christmas Shoes is the most horrible, un-Christian Christmas song of all time. I just heard it today on LaunchCast, and was stunned by its sheer bloody awfulness. Not only is it ham-handedly manipulative, not only is it song by someone who never met a note they couldn’t kill, but it has the most appallingly amoral message of any Christmas song I have ever heard.
The premise is terribly shallow. A little kid wants to buy shoes for his dying Mommy so that she can look good for Jesus when she dies. The song starts out trying to tug at our heartstrings by advocating the notion that Jesus cares what you look like, as if the Jimmy Choos would sway St. Peter. It is not an auspicious start to a song supposedly about the meaning of Christmas. I might have been willing to overlook that if the rest of the song didn’t miss the point of Jesus’ ministry just as badly.
The end of the song was so stunning, so vacuous, so counter to everything that I have ever been taught about Christianity that I had to find the lyrics to make sure I had heard them correctly. I had. Unfortnately:
I knew I’d caught a glimpse of heaven’s love
As he thanked me and ran out
I knew that God had sent that little boy
To remind me just what Christmas is all about
The little boy in the lyrics is poor, his mother is about to die and he doesn’t have enough money to buy her new shoes. The singer-narrator thinks that God sent him the little boy so that he, the narrator, could be reminded about the true meaning of Christmas. Now, I am going to go out on a limb here a little and suggest that God’s plan does not include killing a young woman and leaving an orphan and widower behind so that some self-satisfied prick in a department store can feel a little bit of heaven’s love. How self-centered, how completely and totally disconnected from the spirit of the Gospels do you have to be to think that God would kill a person and crush a little boy’s heart so that you could learn a little lesson about the spirit of giving? This song couldn’t reek of privilege and clueless-ness any more if it had included a message from God to bet on the Vikings, because He favored them on Sunday. I seriously have to question whether or not this song writer would recognize a Bible if he saw one, because it certainly doesn’t seem as if he has actually read one.
God does not reward the faithful with SUVs, He does not punish the wicked with slum apartments, He does not care who wins a football game, and He doesn’t kill the mommies of little boys so that bored men in checkout lines can feel a little special Christmas glow.
If there is a Jesus, and He is coming back, I hope he does it soon. I think we have run out the string here.
Absolutely the worst!
Comment 12/8/2006
ummmm. that song is the best you guys are CRAZY.
Comment 12/19/2006
Kevin,
As a person who actually says “if there is a Jesus”, you hardly qualify as an expert on what Christmas is all about or Christianity for that matter.
It is clear you missed the point of the song by miles and it seems your bitterness may have clouded your willingness to actually hear what was being said.
Comment 12/19/2006
What the heck!! that song is a great song you werido im a christan and i think that it is a good song you must be hearing things mister!! casue it has a good meaning to it!! just cause you are a bitter little person that does not mean you have to say that you dont like it and ou have ot put it up on your blog or whatever this is !!!
sincerly,
Angell
Comment 12/20/2006
Try this one:
You’re Not the Kind of Ho (That Santa Had in Mind)
Dr. BLT
words and music by Dr. BLT (c) 2006
http://www.drblt.net/music/hosong.mp3
Bruce
aka Dr. BLT
Comment 12/21/2006
December 20, 2006
I have to agree with Brian (#3 response). The first thing that went through my head was also, if this is a true christian why would they make the comment “if there is a jesus”. I also agree that you’ve been obviously blinded what the song is about by your bitterness. If you opened your heart, when you heard the song, you would understand it wasn’t the fact that the little boys mommy was dying or even that he was able to buy her shoes before her death. The meaning of the song was that this gentleman was able to give something to someone else at this time of the year. I thought the meaning of Christmas was that each of us could give, not receive, just as our lord Jesus Christ did when he sacraficed his life on the cross. Lady, you need to look inside yourself and figure out why you are so bitter and work on your own issues before you start judging others!!!!
Sherrie from Texas
Comment 12/21/2006
Kevin -
I feel like you’re getting ganged up on here. As a fellow leftie, I wanted to let you know that I think your analysis is spot on, but that there are more dangerous issues at foot. You can’t simply label the song “The Christmas Shoes” as the ‘worst Christmas song ever,’ because you will unnecesarily offend the large segment of the populace self-identifying as Christian that loves this song. The proper question to ask is why they like this song so much - despite its seeming so un-Christian.
If the song were merely about ‘giving’ as Sherrie seems to indicate, then what need would there be for the boy to be poor? What need would there be for the boy’s mother to be dying? If these are irrelevant to the message of the song, then the inclusion of these details would distract from the message of the song. The song could have been about the man giving the shoes to the boy regardless of his ‘need’; his mother could be sick or otherwise incapacitated, but it hardly seems necessary for her to be on her deathbed. Jesus taught to give to others for giving’s sake; he gave his life to us whether we were worthy of this gift or not. This is not the model proposed in the song, as you’ve correctly identified. In either instance of giving (the boy gives shoes to his mother; the man gives the shoes to the boy), it’s never a free gift.
I think defenders of the song might believe that the ‘true spirit of Christmas’ is that in ‘giving’ we align ourselves with the awesome power of God. I want to argue that in ‘giving’ a) the giver fulfills a predestined divine mission and b) derives benefit therewith. The actual significance of the man buying the shoes for the kid is that his presence is *necessary* in order for the sequence of ordained events to occur. In buying the shoes he finds himself fulfilling providence, and this experience, understood as such by the buyer, brings him peace and warmth. The actual significance of the boy gifting the shoes to his mother is that she can look beautiful for Jesus when she passes on ON Christmas day itself. You might argue that Jesus isn’t into superficialities like nice shoes - that he hung out with lepers and prostitutes. This is besides the point - the woman is coming face to face with God on His birthday, an event of tremendous importance. You’ll notice that the man does not question the logic of the boy that the shoes are of tremendous importance. Neither do the boy nor does the man express undue sadness at the passing of mother; what’s crucial is that each does his part to fulfill the ceremonial rite. In doing so, they both fulfill the will of God on His birthday and obtain great joy and peace in return.
This song ignores the problem of evil as you’ve described it, i.e. “What kind of God would kill a mother just so a man can feel good about himself about buying shoes for her?” The idea, rather, is that evil can be regulated and contained through the fulfillment of God’s will. The man and the boy find themselves as instruments of God’s will; nothing is unaccounted for; everything falls according to plan. This is just as Christmas is - same every year, just like they always predict it to be. It provides comfort to an audience that needs to know that scary as it all may seem (and the song became a hit, as you’ll recall, immediately after the September 11 attacks), everything is going to God’s plan and that they’re essentially a crucial part of it. In this view, that the song is “self-centered” is not entirely negative.
To recap: the song is less about the ethics and meaning of giving as we read in the Bible. It is about servicing the needs of strangers and our connectedness through God at a superficial level, and about our role in Providence at a deeper level.
Comment 12/26/2006
We would all be a lot better off if we could simply be a bit more tolerant. If one fellow likes to call a Chsritmas song the worst there is, let him say so. You may be of different opinion, but there is no need to get personal. Religion can’t really be discussed, it’s very personal and some beilieve, some don’t. And the one that believe believe in many different things….
Comment 2/19/2007
IT IS TRYING TO MAKE U CRY. DA. BECAUSE IT IS NOT REAL. BUT ANY WAY(IT IS NOT THE WORST) I THINK IT COULD HAPPEN BUT IF IT WAS THAT WOULD BE A DIFFRENT STORY.IT IS RELLY NOT ABOUT YOUR RELIGION.SOME SAY IT IS BUT THIS IS MY OPINION.BUT I THINK IT IS NOT THE WORST SO YOU GUYS THAT THINK IT IS THE WORST ……THINK ONE MORE TIME.
Comment 11/11/2007
Umm What the heck! This is the most moving and heart-felt song i have heard for quite a while. I will remember it for a long time
Comment 11/16/2007
Ummm…. what surprises me is that you went out of your way to make a web page about how horrible this song is. Really, get over yourselves. Perhaps if you didn’t have your head stuck in your “book of worldly virtues” you could learn to accept things beyond your little cramped world. So how about you sit in a room and play that song for six hours straight and see if your opinion still remains. I mean seriously……….YOU MADE A WEB PAGE.
Comment 11/22/2007
I refuse to believe anyone in their “right” mind enjoys this crappy sappy song. It’s bad. I’m going to call it the worst song ever in the history of the world.
If the man wanted to help the poor boy out why doesn’t he take him home and give him a shower or help pay for the funeral?
I think it’s a scam, the parents send the boy into department store on Christmas Eve and hook people into buying shoes for the supposedly dying mother, then they sell them on ebay.
Comment 11/25/2007
Some people have no life!!! Who cares who does or doesn’t like the song. I like it and that is it. Its a song, like it or you don’t. Leave at that!!!
Comment 11/27/2007
I just heard this song on the radio driving home from school actually. While searching for the lyrics, title, etc. to pass it on to others, I stumbled upon this sight. And let me provide a response, if you will.
Here is the issue at hand. The discussion has turned into whether or not this is the worst Christmas song ever and what the true meaning of Christmas is. Vauguely referenced has been Christianity and the values, beliefs, etc. that come along with it. However, to be christian is to be a follower of God and God has made Himself known through the revelation of His word, the Holy Bible. So, to discuss the issue further, instead of basing everything on what we think, or know, or feel, to ultimately come to a conclusion about the song, it would make sense to take it to God. And how does one do that? Hold it up to the mirror of the Scriptures and judge it by that.
Mr. “leftie” had the right idea about looking at it objectively through a standard, just not the standard of God.
First of all, check out Jeremiah 17:9-10 “The heart is deceitful above all things,
And desperately wicked;
Who can know it?
10 I, the LORD, search the heart,
I test the mind,
Even to give every man according to his ways,
According to the fruit of his doings. ”
Feelings, emotions, what our heart tells us is lead by our inherent sin. if we merely follow what we like or find emotionally attractive, it is very easily to be lead astray. girls, you’re more subject to this than men typically, but it follows for everyone.
secondly, the way love is described in the new testament, the fulfillment of the law, that which we are commanded to do, is as self sacrifice. the way jesus surrendered his life for us when he was nailed to the cross. he was not killed, he could have let himself down, but he willingly laid down his life so that the will of God could be fulfilled.
what was touching to me in this song was that the little boy had apparently been raised in such a manner that he did not fear death. that he knew his mom was going to see jesus and he was rather more excited for her to go and wanted her to “look her best” because she was going. now, that totally goes against the idea the world has. grief, sadness, the “i can’t go on” without him/her thought runs through the minds, hearts, and souls of those who don’t know jesus, who don’t have hope of a life after this time on earth. that this little boy was told by his father that his mom was going to die, to leave them widowed and alone on this earth, but he was excited that she was going to meet jesus, that’s what stirred my emotions.
how this could be a sight of heaven’s love, meaning the love that God modeled in his son Jesus Christ and desires for us to fulfill as well, i make two assumptions:
1. if the man was a true, bible believing, God honoring, persected christian inside and out, he noticed this same thing. that a younger generation was being taught to share in the love of his God and that amidst all the nonsense, increasing sin and lack of regard much less reverence for the Allmighty over creation God was still working, however insignificantly it might seem to the common eye. in that sense, being able to take care of the poor and needing without regard for himself and only desiring to serve his little acquaintance, matthew 5:37-40 “Then the righteous will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You, or thirsty and give You drink? 38 When did we see You a stranger and take You in, or naked and clothe You? 39 Or when did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 40 And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me” or james 2:14-17. while the mother did not need the shoes to get to heaven and they really were irrelevant which the man should have explained to the boy (though i’m sure that wouldn’t fit into the song lyrics very well particularly when you’re trying to make christianity a popular thing by watering it down to a point where its no gospel message at all, just happy feelings and “giving” for the “reason of the season” because “we can’t take the christ out of christmas…cause then it would just be mas and that sounds funny”) though the boy might not even understand that until he was a little older anyways..
2. the second option and probably the more likely because christianity is not a fade and jesus said if you truly follow him you will be persecuted for it because to boldy speak jesus christ means to bring people to the cross where they get the opportunity to see themselves as absolute failures with no hope of anything and all of their “good works” are selfish and deceitful, and becase they then are encouraged to give up everything to follow Christ who you can’t really “prove” existed but have to “believe by blind faith” and then accept the retaliation that each person gives when they see who they really are and they need something to take it out on…thats what the gospel does…but, clearly, thats not what this song does..its uplifting, light hearted, makes you want to feel good, or emotionally sympathetic, and how great everything is…its not great and when its all over, theres going to be two destinations..heaven or hell.. and jesus said that the majority of us will be going to hell because of our stubborn hearts and disobedience to obey his commandments that he provides all the means to follow…no, it is more likely that this is the stance this song takes, that the writer, singer, etc. likes the idea of christianity and the good stuff that comes with it but didn’t want to subscribe fully to it so instead decided to use it for selfish reasons, manipulating and twisting truth to turn a profit during a time of year when people are really out there searching for the truth. in that case, this song turns into a false teaching, not just the “worst christmas song ever”.
Jesus isn’t about Christmas and isn’t about Easter. true, those are significant reminders of important events, but Jesus is year round. that should be easy to deduce from the fact that he was, is, and will be…eternal life…sound familiar?
in any case. Jesus’s name is at least out there and God can truly use that to win anyone, so whether or not this is a false teaching doesnt matter to anyone but the people involved in writing it. it’s them that will have to answer to the Lord of Hosts in that final day.
For those of you that know Christ, stand strong in the faith and speak boldy, live boldly, and love the Lord with all of your heart and mind and strength. the day approaches so be prepared. to those that don’t truly know Christ, the liars and fakers you know who you are, the unsure, and those potentially completely in the dark, look around you. The proof of God is everywhere and Jesus christ is the only answer. He is THE WAY, THE TRUTH, and THE LIFE. i can promise you He is faithful and will not let you fall if you turn to him. its not a blind faith as so much as this…For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? romans 8:24, Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. hebrews 11:1.
seeing isn’t believing, my friends. believing is seeing. and when you believe, oh how clearly you will see.
though i may be a little wordy, it is only for the fact that i desire to explain as best i can the gift i have been given and want all to share in. if my words cause you to stumble or lose track of what you think you know, turn to the holy bible. for that is where god speaks and its one on one with the Alpha and Omega Himself. to Him and Him alone be the glory forever.
Comment 11/28/2007
We talk about the true meaning of Christmas and the “terrible” song, and rather than talk about the love of Jesus, you are attacking and using choice words or comments to state your point… How is it that we have this much time to beat the singer-songwritter about this song. I dont understand how ANYONE can benefit from this garbage that is the Christmas shoes song explanation you have here. Who are we to question what God does to reach a “self-satisfied prick in a department store”. Do you remember where you where before you met Jesus? Maybe you were not a in this guys shoes but you were a drug addict, a womanizer, addicted to porn, smoker, a drunk should I keep going? Let’s stop this judgment and spread the message of peace and love which is what this song portrays. The man in the song saw what he was doing as a chore, when the kid saw it as a blessing. Grab hold of what you agree with, and if you don’t agree with it, just let it go.
God Bless.
Comment 11/29/2007
Are you seriously insane? The point of the song is not about how his mom will look pretty, but how much he loves his mom, and how important family is! That’s what he’s talking about when he says “what Christmas is all about” The little boy is young, and has a simpler mind (thus the “meeting Jesus” instead of dying) So the little boy wants to but his momma one last gift to make her look pretty for Jesus. the song does not imply Jesus cares what she looks like, it implies that the boy loves his momma and wants her to look pretty. If you think anything different, you are simply insane. seriously.
Comment 12/3/2007
I think I would have to agree mostly with what Abraham and Kim say as well as parts of what just about everyone else said.
I hadn’t heard this song for a long time and as I was listening to Christmas songs on the radio. A remake of Frosty the Snowman came on and I pondered on what songs have been written lately to bring out the spirit of Christmas. Obviously songs, such as Frosty or a few others about Turkey and Mistletoe don’t do much at all in trying to bring out the spirit of Christmas when compared to this song.
Well the Christmas Shoes was about the only song that came to my mind because of how it made me feel when I had heard it.
Now, we can look at what the man, the boy, or his mom in the song might have felt or we can look at what we ourselves might have felt.
We shouldn’t judge others for what they feel about this song. It isn’t easy for my either. I for one don’t believe this song teaches false doctrine because life and our experiences should be uplifting. We must recognize how much we need our Saviour Jesus Christ and how we are unable to enter our Father’s kingdom without Christ’s love and sacrifice, but we must not forgot that Christ is our brother and that we become joint heirs with Christ in our Father’s kingdom as Paul says (Romans 8:16-17). Those verses tell us the Spirit bears witness we are children of our Father. Behold, we are all brothers and sisters, should we not love each other as such. I do not mean to censure my brother Nick in his words above, for I believe his intent was to provide truth, but Paul also reminds us of the gifts of the Spirit including joy, love, peace, etc (Galatians 5:22-23) The Savior did take up His cross, as we must, but He came down from it - that should also be included in our celebration of Christmas. His birth lead to that. Because of that we’ll all be resurrected. Isn’t that something to be joyful about and look forward to despite the hardhsips of life. We should look for God’s hand in everything and there we will find peace and joy. Isn’t life wonderful. Isn’t the great plan of our Heavenly Father wonderful. How grateful we should be to His Son who made it all possible. We must follow His teachings. Did He not command us to become as a little child?
If a little child feels the need to buy some shoes for his mom to meet the Savior maybe there is something to that. The Savior certainly didn’t rebuke the woman for annointing Him with costly oil. I don’t think he would rebuke this boy nor us for the time spent on this website. He is so much more loving than that. He loves His family as we should love ours. Kim hit that right on.
This is long already but I would like to include a personal story that illustrates this for me at least: When I was a missionary and telling the world about the risen Lord, I once saw a woman sleeping in a tarp on the ground outside a grocery store on Christmas Eve. I knew that perhaps most of all she needed the joy our message would bring, but at that moment I felt what she really needed was a Christmas dinner. So I went in and bought enough for a humble meal and just sat it next to her and continued home. I don’t desire to boast my good works, but only show the impact that songs such as the Christmas Shoes have had on me and can have on others. I felt the Spirit testify I had done the right thing just as it testifies of the goodness of this song.
Comment 12/6/2007
Been looking up bad christmas songs,,,and this is kind of shallow but i remember a song from the sixties where the kid is talking to santa or maybe a department store santa is talking and he wants his brother back because all his mother does is cry,,,his brother was killed in vietnam
I was a kid when that came out and it still bothers me
Comment 12/6/2007
Who buries people with shoes on? Most caskets are closed at the bottom. This sort of maudlin sappiness is what give Christianity a bad name. Momma ain’t going to be walking in heaven and if she is, well, she won’t need shoes. Ihave it on the highest authority that heaven is soft.
Comment 12/8/2007
This song is not the worst Christmas song ever. Guy who spends his time analyzing and tearing apart a good-hearted tune is a big fat deusch bag. I would have to think that the majority of the people who read your blog would think that you are just pathetic! burn in hell you peice of shit. Christmas shoes makes my friend billy cry and that tells me that it can touch the hearts of the numbest. THAT’s WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ALL ABOUT! someone should have bought your silly ass some red christmas shoes.
Comment 12/14/2007
u are an idiot
Comment 12/17/2007
you are such a freakin idiot… “if there is a jesus” go screw yourself. i cant believe you. i pray you are the only one of your kind on this earth or we’d all be dammed.
..such an idiot…
Comment 12/17/2007
I find it amazing that so many of the “true christians” that defend this piece of treacle masquerading as a christmas song are so vicous and judgemental. Wow, way to show your christian faith and beliefs.
Here are my personal problems with the song…
1. as someone else stated when you are buried you are barefoot (ask a mortician if you don’t believe me)
2. Shoes are material possesions which do you no good once you pass on.
3. Do you good christians really think Jesus is so shallow as to give a rats butt if the woman has new shoes on?
4. If the singer was truly giving of himself couldn’t he have sprung for the entire price of the shoes and maybe a suit for the kid to wear to the funeral?
5. God sent the kid to remind him what christmas is about… Gross commercialization? Rampant consumerism? Buying stuff we really can’t afford just to buy the love of others?
Is this truly how Jesus knows we love him? By our trampling another shooper so we can get the XBOX 360 at the 3 hour midnight miracle sale?
Please…
Jesus save me from your followers
Comment 12/18/2007
I agree that this song is the worst. My problems with the song:
I am bothered by the implication that one cannot be charitable without religion.
Why isn’t this kid home with his dying mother instead of out shopping? His comforting presence would benefit mom way more than a pair of shoes she will never wear.
It’s not so much that Jesus will see the shoes or care about the shoes, but that the kid thinks that this would be important to Jesus. Why does the song celebrate such an anti-Christian notion?
I also don’t like the man’s smug attitude about giving the kid money for the shoes. Charity should be done for its own sake, not to brag to others. Another anti-Christian position.
Why was the kid filthy? I’ve been poor but we kids were always clean. If he’s old enough to go to the store alone, he’s old enough to take a bath.
A very nitpicky point… What kid knows his mother’s shoe size? I think this is an example of the writer’s carelessness and demonstrates that the story is more about manipulating the listeners’ emotions and less about making sense.
And finally, the point of the entire story is one man’s epiphany about what Christmas is all about. This took the form of throwing pocket change at a kid with very major problems. Is that really the meaning of Christmas?
Comment 12/28/2007
He also said “she’s been sick for quite a while and I know these shoes will make her smile” the kid wants his mom to be happy. He wants her to look beautiful if she meets jesus tonight, meaning thats why he needs the shoes so bad in case she dies tonight. its just an act of kindness its just a song.. who cares if he knows the shoe size or not.. its a good song, a caring song, get a life
Comment 3/30/2008